No country for old recruits

The interestingly named Xzavier Dickson, a four-star defensive lineman from Griffin, Ga., wants to play at Georgia. Or maybe Alabama. Or possibly Georgia. Or it could be Alabama.

He can't decide.

So today, before tonight's Under Armour All-American game, he plans to flip a coin. Best of five flips wins.

Now you know why college football coaches always look like they need an IV drip of Advil.

And if anybody needs an assistant to handle this sort of situation, may we recommend the also-interestingly-named Anton Chigurh. He already spends a lot of time on the road.

Sugar Bowl wrapup: One quarterback makes some money, another one loses it

Idle thoughts on the best bowl game so far:

1. The Super Dome, though a bit of a dump, is a great place for a big game. Part of what makes the SEC Championship an annual must-see is all that noise and energy trapped in an oversized crock pot. The second half of the Sugar Bowl offered the same ingredients: the Arkansas fans finding their voices; the always great Ohio State crowd hanging in, and amazing mood swings up and down the field. Great fun.

2. The more I watch Ryan Mallett, the more he reminds me of the yellow-toothed bully in "A Christmas Story." He's bigger than everybody else, he's obviously gifted. But hit him in the mouth and he starts to whine. Then he starts to jitterbug -- badly. Against Alabama this year, Mallett made Herculean throws . . . until he got bopped. He went on to throw three ghastly interceptions, similar to one that ended the game Tuesday night. (Oh yeah, his receivers also dropped the ball at key times against the Tide.) If Mallett doesn't like being hit now, do we expect his demeanor to improve in the NFL? Don't think the scouts haven't noticed.

3. Good calls by Todd Blackledge foreshadowing Mallett's killer pick. The former Penn State QB pointed out early on that Mallett was making bad decisions as his pocket closed. With the game on the line, Mallett made another one. And because of Blackledge's good work, it was almost predictable.

4. Terrelle Pryor plays great football in big games. He took apart Oregon in last year's Rose Bowl and was his team's best offensive weapon against Arkansas. Though still not a picture-perfect passer, his throwing motion has clearly improved while at Columbus. Some NFL team will give him a shot -- as well as an excuse to skip out on his promised return to OSU. He and some of his teammates face fve-game suspensions in 2011 for taking illegal benefits.

5. "The clanking sound you hear . . . " We've already talked about the dropped passes (give me two of them back and Arkansas likely wins the game). But how in the world doesn't Arkansas recover Pryor's fumble at the goal line? How doesn't it intercept Pryor's end-over-end pass in the second half? And why in the world do the Hogs fall on the blocked punt instead of scoring a touchdown? Strange game, football.

6. When was the last time you saw a defensive line, without the help of blitzes, put that much pressure on a quarterback? Sure, Mallett has the mobility of a paper weight, but the Buckeye lineman, particularly Cameron Heyward, knocked Arkansas back on its heels all night. (And, yes, Dawg fans, how in the world did Mark Richt let Heyward get out of Atlanta?)

7. Speaking of Heyward . . . He had to leave the game after a Hog lineman dove at his knees after Heyward had leaped to contest a pass and was completely vulnerable. Legal perhaps, but incredibly cheap. The same kind of shot injured Marcel Dareus for several games. Last night's blow would draw an NFL review and a probable fine. The NCAA needs to clean those up.

8. Congrats to Ohio State. You're 1 and 9 against the SEC in bowl games. Another win and you crack the Mendoza Line.

mg

The Big 10 bellcow goes for 0-10 aganst the SEC in the Sugar Bowl

This is a tragedy, this tattoo business for The Ohio State.

Here we have the biggest underdog since the Karate Kid, a dogged little school (enrollment 65,000) that doggedly pursues gridiron excellence (TOSU spends $31.7 million a year on football, the most of any bowl team) and yet gets picked on repeatedly by the bullies of the SEC. You know, those Deep South freak show where all the players are fast (they aren't weighed down by school books) and the coaches are sadistic megalomaniacs (Disclaimer: in the case of sinsei Nick Saban, those traits are strongly suspected by have never been clinically diagnosed.)

The Buckeyes, which treat the post-season as an educational opportunity -- in this case, independent studies on the benefits of the free-market system -- are 0-9 against the SEC in bowl games. In a character-building move, the school and the NCAA have guaranteed TOSU will be at full strength, even if the boys in Indianapolis, playing the role of Mr. Miyagi, had to intercede to make this a fair fight.

So far the contrived Big 10-SEC bowl matchups have been a little one-sided. Now TOSU, its top players wearing fresh battle paint, try to salvage some respect for the men of the Midwest, while keeping its SEC losing streak in single digits.

The battle plan for tonight's game is simple: Sweep the leg. If Arkansas can slow down the run and run the ball just a little, the Big 10's best program will slink back to Columbus, 0-10 against the SEC, and facing the slew of penalties waiting at the start of the 2011 season.

Arkansas is so-so defensively. But unlike just about any other Bobby Petrino team, the Hog defenders has improved over the season. Arkansas' offense has done the same, ripping apart LSU with the run and pass in its last game. OSU has a more disciplined defense than LSU, but not its size or speed.

Which brings us to the final factor: the quarterbacks. It's not a stretch to call Ryan Mallette and Terrelle Pryor mirror twins. Both are oversized and physically gifted. Both are on the temperamental side. The difference is Pryor, the MVP of last year's Rose Bowl Game, has replaced Cam Newton as college football biggest lightning rod. Unlike Newton, some of Pryor's biggest critics are among his own fans.

So how does he respond? Well, is the guess here. But not well enough.

Bucks on, Bucks offed.

Arkansas, 31-24

"The winner of the 2011 Oscar for short-form documentary is . . . "

As the state of Alabama prepares to once again play the sun in the college fooball solar system, the University of Alabama family wishes its Auburn relations well, or in words Tiger Nation can truly take to heart: "Keep it down home, cuz!"

We're talking about the BCS trophy, of course, which, if its buses arrive at the stadium by halftime, Auburn should win -- the SEC's fifth straight title.

In the meantime, we'll have this to keep us warm until spring practice.

p.s.

Roll Tide

UGA Agonistes: Shoveling out the dog pens at Georgia

Following a humbling end to a humbling Georgia season, Atlanta Journal-Constitution columinist Tony Barnhart has this advice on what head coach Mark Richt must say to the Dawg faithful and how he should say it.

Dawg on.

On a related note, Barnhart's colleague Mark Bradley says the identifical records of Georgia and Georgia Tech are misleading. Tech lacks players, he says, Georgia lacks coaching.
MG

Meanwhile, back in the realm of total domination . . .

There's very little left to say in the aftermath of the Coronation Saturday -- a resounding Jan. 1 reminder of the SEC's prowless.

Keep in mind that the three conference teams with the best records (though after Alabama's performance against Michigan State, we will not call them the SEC's three BEST TEAMS) haven't even played. Yet the middle-of-the-pack contingent of Alabama, Florida and Mississippi State outscored the Big 10 co-champ along with traditional powers Penn State and Michigan by almost 4 to 1. The Big 10 went 0-5 on the day, and will need a Sugar Bowl win by THE Tattoo U to even approach the Mendoza line in the bowl games that matter.

Some observations:

Poor Michigan State. Sparty's wonderful season was effectively buried in Orlando by the first Category 6 hurricane in recorded history. To call it Alabama's first complete game of the season is like saying Sitting Bull had a nice game plan at Little Bighorn.

Scary thought for the rest of the college football world: Maybe the SEC is just too good to allow the kind of dominance the Tide unleashed on 11-win MSU. Maybe the gaps in size and speed between Bama and State were that pronounced. Or maybe Alabama was just that good. Dinged-up defenders such as Marcel Dareus and Courtney Upshaw played faster than they have all year. An offensive line broken up again and again by injuries had time to heal and helped produce a running game missing since the first weeks of the season.

This is the Alabama fans expected to see. Instead they got a much more sputtering rendition, a team that was never as good as its individual parts, a team that started to come together in its first half against Auburn, then showed what might have been in a meaningless bowl game. In the end, the record books will say Alabama ended up 10-3. In actuality, Nick Saban's team fell about three plays short of defending its national title against Oregon.

Mississippi State has its coach. Michigan needs a new one. In high school mismatches, you can find a team that runs a mostly vanilla version of its offense and still looks explosive. Put another way: When was the last time you saw a major college football power play defense in the manner that Michigan played it Saturday? Rich Rodriguez has been in Ann Arbor three years -- plenty of time to put the school on probation, plenty of time to divide the fanbase and, given Michigan's stature, more than enough time to put a competitive team on the field. Nick Saban, Urban Meyer and Bob Stoops all took over struggling tier-one programs and won national championship in their second or third years. Rodriguez' third team, by contrast, made Mississippi State look like the murderous legions of the Dark Lord. RichRod's departure should be announced in the next day or so, then Jim Harbaugh or whomever begins the task of starting over again at UM. The country's winningest program is looking at several more years in the wilderness, and Alabama fans get on their knees each day in thanks that Rodriguez' wife vetoed his move to Tuscaloosa.

As for State . . . Dan Mullen is building something fast and mean at Starkville. In two years he has supplanted Ole Miss as the top program in a talent-rich state. Each year he adds a little more speed, size and ability to the Maroons. This is quickly becoming a scary, scary team.

Florida won or Penn State lost . . . you can make the case for either. Ironically, the winning coach is stepping away; the losing coach won't leave. Urban Meyer got his last win before he takes his furlough from coaching. His team, with so much misdirected talent, capitalized on enough of its opponent's mistakes to run away at the end. In actuality, Joe Paterno's Lions had their chance in the last minutes. Instead, JoePa's undersized and marginally skilled quarterback threw another killer interception, and that was that.

For a coach that won two national championships in four years, Meyer was ushered out like a department head in a community college. All speculation now turns to his replacement, Will Muschamp, and his reclamation project. With the hiring of Charlie Weiss as offensive coordinator, Muschamp shared the worst kept secret in college football: He will dismantle Meyer's spread, even if it will take him several years to recruit what he needs to run his new offense. First things first: Muschamp must rebuild the Gators' toughness. During Meyer's last years, they became a pretty team of top-ranked recruits who looked good, talked plenty, but didn't like it when someone hit them in the mouth. That's Muschamp's first challenge: finding 22 kids who will hit back.


MG

Now is the time for the real SEC to stand up . . .

Ugly, uglier, ugliest . . .

Some "yeah, I'm still on vacation but somebody has to write something" observations on the SEC's 0-3 start in the bowls.

-- Easy y'all. Reports of the SEC's demise are greatly overstated. This, after all, is the SEC (L)East, which this year would be competitive only in the Ugliest Dog pageant.

Still . . .

**The officiating in the UNC-Tennessee game was a carnival, particularly when the game got down to the winning and losing. Let's start with the personal foul call against Janzen Jackson that put Carolina in range for its tying field goal. Sorry, y'all, but that was a clean, albeit ferocious, hit. Jackson led with his shoulder and aimed at the back. Savage but perfectly legal. The Big 10 refs also blew the call on the next-to-the-last play of regulation, which needed only a bunch of clowns on scooters to qualify as a bona fide circus. Illegal participation -- running a play with too many men on the field -- is a 15 yard penalty, not 5. Put a second back on the clock, if you will, but the UNC kick should have been 50 yards, not 39.

That said . . . Tennessee didn't distinguish itself with its on-the-field antics. Derek Dooley still looks a tad wild-eyed and overwhelmed on the sidelines, and his players made enough mistakes to keep the game close. In Daniel Lincoln, they have The Scott Norwood Award winner, legendary for the ones that he missed (Alabama fans passed the hat for Lincoln's trophy). The Vols did test drive what should be one of the SEC's best passing attacks in the years ahead. Better still, quarterback Tyler Bray clearly displayed the behavioral qualities that next year will put his name up next to Casey Clausen as the most hated player in the conference. Can't wait to watch his personal development.

**Georgia fans continue to amaze us. They are passionate, mean-spirited (we like that about them) and know few equals in their love for their team and their disdain for their rivals. They are also clinically delusional, which is OK to a point because most of us lack any objectivity when it comes to their own teams.

But every year Georgia people believe they are destined to win the SEC, and they stick to it, even though this Bulldog edition was just woeful. Which hasn't stopped Dawg fans from lighting their torches and storming the castle after Friday's loss to Central Florida, a top 25 team that did all the little things a good football team does to win a game. The Liberty Bowl was a bit of a dogfight, except Central Florida had the better clamp hold. The longer George O'Leary's team held on, the more the fight went out of Georgia. Mark Richt has a lot of little/essential things to fix before Georgia kicks off next September against Boise State -- when Georgia will clearly be a favorite for the BCS Championship Game.


**The Spurrier/Garcia road show sputters on toward the pathological. You would think that after the third straight unsightly bowl performance from the tandem that one of them -- read Garcia -- might go. This is a team with improving talent and still way too many holes in talent, coaching and intangibles. Yet the biggest gap remains between the ears of its veteran quarterback. When does Spurrier say enough?

Which brings us to today's games:

Florida-Penn State: Tony Barnhart over on the Atlanta Journal-Constitution says Florida has too many athletes for Joe great-grandPA's team. My question to Tony: Have those Florida kids of whom he speaks been studying abroad this fall? Florida has had more athletes than every team it has played and is lucky to be 7-5! The highlight of their season was beating Georgia (which should be playing Oregon for the national championship if not for the minor detail that the Dawgs lost more games than they won). Sure, it's Urban Meyer's last game as Florida's coach. But this team hasn't played hard for Meyer all year. Nittany Lions, 20-16.

Mississippi State-Michigan: The Rich Rodriquez Parting Gift Bowl shows the dark side of tradition. MSU, whose only legacies are losing and cheating, hires an unproven assistant who runs a goofy offense, mouths off to everybody and after two years of exceeding low expectations is now considered one of the hottest names in coaching. Michigan, with all its history and wins, runs off a coach, botches his replacement, and "settles" on an outsider: Rodriguez, fresh off a highly successful stint at West Virginia. Three years later, the team still can't play and Ann Arbor still keens over the absence of a "Michigan Man" at the helm of the program. Note to Big Blue: Your last Michigan Man lost to App State. Word is that Rodriquez is out whether he wins or loses, and since his team stopped playing for him months back, it's hard to imagine one last rousing rendition of "Hail to the Victors" to send the coach on his way. The EXPATS have long thought the praise for Mississippi State a bit premature. But State has so much more to play for. Bullies, 28-24.

Alabama-Michigan State This game is simple and complicated at the same time. Alabama is bigger, faster and deeper. Michigan State has far more incentive. Alabama didn't play a complete game in 2010 (including the BCS winner over Texas) and had their heart and lungs ripped out in the epic collapse at Auburn. So how long does the good Alabama stick around against the Spartans, and when does the we-could-give-a-rip Alabama take over? The guess here is that the shift change won't occur until the game is in hand, but that Michigan State will make it closer at the end. If Alabama can run the ball, we will have the day's only rout. Tide, 31-22.

Arkansas-tOSU: Jim Tressel is doing what he can to save some face for his team and program, but his decision to play Terrelle and THE Free-Marketeers have completely overwritten the original storyline of the Sugar Bowl, which was: Will The Ohio State University finally beat an SEC school in the post season? The correct answer now is Who Cares? Much of the Buckeye fanbase believes
their star quarterback and the other violators should sit on their wallets. And yet, surely for the personal development of the student-athletes involved, the NCAA says they should play. Too bad, what was easily the second most interesting matchup on the bowl lineup now becomes a morality play -- with not enough morals to go around.

MG